Sunday, December 25, 2011

Christmas Morning.

So early morning, while I blissfully slept, like this;

And as I blissfully thought of the neverland...Suddenly the stupid cellphone rang and this is what happened;
So it was my friend- Sonal. A one of her kind species from Bihar. The last part being absolutely irrelevant...but I mentioned it nonetheless. Because............because, well, it's MY blog.
Introducing.....

SONALLLLLLLLL!!!




Anyhoo. So the point of that was- Sonal ruined my sleep, and when I politely tried to excuse myself to freshen up, she very politely responded with- "Don't try very hard on the crapper...you know with your sprained feet and all."

So it's established that the reason behind my lack of friends is my utmost disrespect for all of them (refer to the doodles above). And even the ones that I do seem to have, are extremely cheap and pointless.


But, that's not what 25th December is about, 25th December is about....

















































The first time I threw up on Santa!
Yes, I did that. The guy was with the carol kids and I was 4. I was getting extremely frustrated that he won't let me touch his beard, so I sulked for a while. Like...this-















But nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. He didn't give it up then! He decided to annoy me further- after discovering me sulking in an empty kitchen, he dragged me out,  and started dancing around me. I initially watched him dance around, - round round round round round round round. round round round round round round round. round round round round round round round. round round round round round round round. round round round round round round round. round round round round round round round. round round round round round round round. round round round round round round round. round round round round round round round. round round round round round round round. round round round round round round round. round round round round round round round. round round round round round round round. round round round round round round round. round round round round round round round. round round round round round round round. round round round round round round round. round round round round round round round. round round round round round round round. round round round round round round round. round round round round round round round. round round round round round round round. round round round round round round round. round round round round round round round. round round round round round round round....
and finally. I puked.





Yes, seeing that evening's Maggi on his red Santa costume was very satisfying. Turned out, Santa was Mr. Gogoi who lived upstairs at that time.
Mr. Gogoi never spoke to me after that.


But hey! 25th December isn't about that, it is about












































Aneesh Renganathan's Birthday! 
Woooooooooooo-hoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

Aneesh, aka Blog Stalker or-




This particular species endemic to Tamil Nadu was discovered by me loitering in the corner of my law coaching building.  He was smoking pot.




















N-uh.
He was crying.























N-uh.
He was...... on the phone.






















Yes, he was.
Anyways, so the creepy thing is 5 months later, there is almost nothing we don't know about each other. Which is sad and annoying. The only thing you need to know about him is- he's overly emotional with a penchant for scaring you with purported horror stories of his life when there is actually no horror there.



.
...
...
...
...
..
...
...
..
.
...
..
.
.
..
....
.....
....
....
....
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
..
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...





 He likes to think of himself as a deep, intricate guy- when he's as shallow and pointless as me.  And he wishes people "Happy Orgasms!" on their birthday instead of going "Happy Birthday!" like normal people.That's about it, now you can practically write a biography on the guy. 



Oh and he got a Samsung blabla S2 by his sister (who, by the way is super awesome from what I've heard) So he thinks nobody can top that. Which is..kind of true. But I sent him a text worth, like, a buck. I dont think anybody can top THAT.
So wish him a luuuuuuuuuurveeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeely Happy Budday too. (Men are requested not to bother)



On a serious note, I just came back from a Christmas party, and I saw the one person I wasn't really expecting to see. 
Uh....a note to those who've been bullied- don't think that bullies stay mean even after growing up. They sometimes realize that they were complete jackasses. And wish they'd never done anything of that sort and actually feel embarrassed about it too.

But when they do apologize and you turn a blind ear. Well, it hurts the bully, irrespective of whether they deserved it or not- especially the ones who gather courage over years and finally have the guts to blurt out a genuine "Sorry!".  


I guess maybe that's why I've learnt, over all these years, the importance of forgiving people. It liberates you and them. So let's make this year about forgiving, yes?



Signing off,
Happy Birthday Aneesh,
I love you Sonal. Just don't call me early morning,


And last but not the least, I'm sorry- again- to the one who I bullied when I was 7. I feel guilty everytime I think of you.











Oh and Merry Christmas to you guys and allllllllllllllllllllllllllll my love :)



6 comments:

Anonymous said...

i am not that fat
that is not how i look
i am not pointless
.......okay maybe the last part might be puahing it a little but...
die remya just die

Thousif Raza said...

I liked it a lot.. loved the doodles too.. was a very eccentric post :) :D

Advance wishes for the new year :)

Take care and keep writing.......

nil said...

Sonal's cartoon must.be.framed.
Period.

SeĐĆendipity™ said...

haha :D You have one hell of an imagination :D

Aneesh said...

^nah i was on the pone and sadly i do wish people happy orgasms

Remya said...

@Thousif- You too man, Happy New Year!

@Nil- It IS genius, isnt it?

@Serendipity - Thank you! er.......................You have a very peaceful blog name.(I'm out of compliments. New Year gatherings take their toll)

@Aneesh- Yes. You do..Nothing to be proud of.