Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Land of Foolingham

It was a lost cause, so they all say- the people of Foolingham
when Mimi Turning went missing one day
It made no sense to look for her, it made no sense
to even worry, after all Mimi was a strong girl not an afternoon curry
of a hungry man!

But her mother didn't hear, she wanted to look,
and of she went without haste to a lone ostrich's place
Hello, sir! said she to Long Legged Ost. I need help
to find my daughter who is lost.
Long Legged Ost lifted his head and said,
Is she a brunette? he asked.
Mama Turning said no.
Is she blonde? He asked
Mama Turning said no.
Is she crazy? He enquired
Mama Turning said no as required,
so then he turned his back to her and said,
Sorry Mama Turning it's time for me to go to bed.
But!- She exclaimed won't you help me out?
I would've if I wanted to, no need to shout!
replied the Long legged Ost.
Don't you want to? Mama Turning asked.
And so spake the old ostrich as he relaxed,
She has been kidnapped by a very dangerous being,
if he comes to know I helped, next time you visit me,
it'll only be my head that you'll be seeing
hanging out my door.

So Mama Turning left and went deep into the wildwood,
she met many birds who nervously twitched their breasts,
fluffed their wings, and launched into a flight not so elegant.
It seemed, they were scared as they had seen a lot, but they were all scared to talk
of this frightful being,
who Mimi needed to flee for her own wellbeing.
She walked and walked Mama Turning- so tired
She was trying all she could, but she wasn't achieving the results
she desired.

Now Mama Turning came across a rather peculiar creature who proclaimed
himself the son of the forest preacher
Who may you be? Mama asked it , why I am the very Capybara of this forest!
it replied with a rather dignified pride.
Mama Turning thought him perfect to be her aid, his royal airs gave him a brave shade,
Oh Caplin! Help me out she said to him, my daughter I cannot find,
some one has stolen her, have you seen her? Please tell me! Be kind.
Caplin considered her plea, raised an eyebrow and said with a mystic glee
I have seen her, yes, I have,
But I can only tell you which direction to go,
for I can reveal no more!
Why? Why not? She demanded in all her maternal weakness
What are you so scared of?
He laughed and threw his weight around, weighing 100 pounds,
he told her well and proper, I ain't scared of no such being,
I do not want to get into all of this, and put myself in a spot
for a little Foolingham girl for whom I care not!
And saying so, he scampered off and told her
to proceed 140 degrees north.

So she skipped and skipped, deeper into the wild,
helpless she felt with every single thought of her lovely child.
Hello there! She called out many times to the shady creatures of the wood
who scampered off seeing her, as they knew she wanted help,
but they did not care so avoided her, lest she pestered them misunderstood.
She walked, her legs parched, her throat tired, madness creeping in
in a Chanel attire.
Nothing made sense anymore, everything was up and down
and that is when she rubbed her eyes as she saw approaching her- a clown.

Hullo there! Mama Turning, welcome to the Wild Wild Jungle
of Foolingham!
I hear you need help, and I would, if you scraped off this growth so fungal
in my ears- as you see my hands no longer are there.
She gaped in disbelief, for true it was! He possessed something like a hole in a tree
rather than human hands!
So she scraped the fungus off, with a heart full of hope, and soon they embarked
the weird duo
on a quest to save Mimi Turning of Foolingham.

And just when they reached the bend, they heard a scream
and peals of laughter,
Mama zoomed her ears to the sound and so did the clown,
and what she discovered thereafter
was something of a surprise!
There stood Mimi Turning playing with a skunk wearing a hat,
He held a blade in his hands and did SWISH!! Swoosh! in mock
Mimi delightfully giggled as Mama stared in shock.
Just then the clown behind her said,
I guess, we've solved the mystery, you thank god for she isn't dead!
He looked at her and considered,
Hey, Mama Turning, you seem terribly shocked,
you sure you dont want to see my tricks with the ball?
Mimi Turning saw her mother and ran to her,
Mommy! You're here! Meet Mr. Skunk who played with me and fought with walls!
Mama Turning stared at everyone surrounding her in appall
and then she covered her ears, opened her mouth to yell.
However, instead, but- Mama Turning got unconscious and fell.

Thus ended the foolish incident of foolish li'l Mimi Turning,
who belonged to the foolish Land of Foolingham.


nil said...

......and that land of Foolingham, my friend, is where we all live in :-)

You were right. Absurd peom, but surely one of my favorites :)

Remya said...

^ Your first line is exactly what I wanted to convey.

nil said...

I'm saoow smaart ^_^

Remya said...

Yes you are honey.
My followers have all died. :|